Now i sit here, with a coffee in my hand. Thinking.. This is the ending. Im thinking back. It has been so long since i started this. That moment was my first beginning. Now its over. All these years.. Now im standing more steady than ever before. I've been through hell and heaven, rain and fire. But now im here. Im standing infront off my own beginnig. Now it's all up to me. It's here it starts. It's my turn to choose how to live my life.

Here I am, this is me. There's no where els on earth I'd rather be. Here I am, it's just you and me.

And tonight we make our dreams come true. It's a new world. It's a new start. It's alive with the beating of young hearts. It's a new day. It's a new plan. I've been waiting for you. Here we are.. We've just begun. And after all this time our time has come. Yah, here we are, still going strong. Right here in the place where we belong. Here I am next to you. And suddenly the world is all brand new. Here I am, where I am gonna stay. Now there's nothing standing in our way. Here I am.. This is me..

My Life In My Hands~

I try to sleep in a bed on fire. A change must come. No matter how.. There's no return. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. But everything will burn. Once again, the night has fallen. Hard thoughts, keep on crawling. Lying awake, desperate yawning. Soon it's here, that bloody morning. I dont like to be frustraded, i dont want to be sedated. Who's gonna be my saviour? Wonder if i'll ever make it. I try to sleep in a bed on fire. A Change must come. No matter how.. There's no return. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. But everthing will burn. I could use some hibernation. Be an interstellar spaceman. One more night and i'll go crazy. Rest would be a new sensation. Early riser, duties calling. What a life, it's so boring. I wanna snooze, oh no! Here it comes that bloody morning!

No matter what people say, no matter what they think. No matter what I love you. You are always here for me when i need you, you make me happy no matter how mad and sad I'm. You always make me smile even if i don't wanna. You make me laugh when im not allowed to. I love everything about you. You got the most beautiful smile i ever seen.

Your eyes shines like stars in the night. When i don't have anyone to turn to you always stands there with open arms. You are my everything and every word I say is true. I love you more than words can say. You are the light that shows my way in the dark. You are my rose in the moonlight. I still remember when we first met and I knew it was something speciel about you but I had no idea that you would mean the world to me. But now I know. You are my world. I were lost but you found me and took my hand and showed me the way back to happiness. I will never forget that moment when I realized I had fallen inlove with you.

Everytime you say I love you feels like the first time you said it and I smile like crazy.

I don't even have to tell my friends when I'm texting you, they look at me and smiles and says to each other that I got that speciel cute smile I only have when I'm talking to you. And every minute I'm without you I miss you. It feels so emptey. It feels like a piece off my heart is missing. You took it with you and as soon as I'm with you again my heart is whole again. Nobody have never made me feel like this. After 1 year and I just love you more and more for every day that passes. Every Minute. You are my everything. I dont know what i would do without you Will.. I love you so muchh <3

Have you ever wanted to break free but felt that your wings are broken? You wanna fly away but you can't get off the ground. The feeling that you are stuck and standing on the same place. But you know you've been high when you feel low. You have to let the pain off your wings to be able to lift them up and be free.

Have you ever felt like you just wanted to turn the time? Turn back to something that you wished you made better? Or to something you regret and always wanted to fix? Maybe you always wanted to turn the time forth? Escape from something til the time its better? I know I've always wished I could do that. Escape to the better. But I keep wondering, why?Why do i wanna do that? Miss all the things on the way to the better? Is it worth it? I wouldnt think so. Every singel acting in your life is a part off you. Would you like to miss experiences that made who you are?

I know myself and i'll always wanna escape, but one day i'll have reached to those better days im dreaming about today.

My life has barely started and i got a lifetime left and I can do what ever I wanna do. Tho we not gonna forget about the real world and sometimes you cant reach to your dreams but the worst thing to do is to lose hope. If you lose hope, you lose your way to live.

You should always hold your dreams tight, but hold your goals even more tight.

Remember, It's Your Life In Your Hands.

Sorrow, sorrow why have you catch me so. Why have you left me in such a big hole? Sorrow, sorrow when will you leave my soul and let my heart breath so. There is nowhere to go if you keep beating on my heart so. Sorrow, sorrow its time to go and let your heart be with your soul.

En morgon. Eey, Så många frågor, inge svar.. Eyyay så många frågor inga svar. En morgon eyy. Jag glömmer aldrig bort min polare, han tittade på mig och sa "Känner du vinden som blåser i stan? Det blir en förändring, allt dåligt blir bra." Jag vet nu att jag ljög när jag svarade "Ja". Jag hörde någon blåste honom idag. Han är borta nu finns bara drogerna kvar. Jag tänker nästan aldrig tillbaks på den dan men vinden han prata om blåser idag. Jag undrar "Går jag ensam här eller visar du min väg från en parallell värld? Jag hoppas du hör mig vart du än är. För den här går ut till våra saknade vänner. Så många frågor utan svar. Så många låtar som fanns kvar. Men vi glömmer aldrig er. Nej, den här går ut till våra saknade vänner, ni kommer alltid leva kvar i varje steg vi tar. Så vi hyllar er nu! Ja, den här går ut till våra saknade vänner.. Våra saknade vänner...Våra saknade vänner..Våra saknade vänner.. Bedöva mig, det känns som jag blivit halv och nu är falska känslor bättre än inga alls och det är inte bara min blick som blivit kall. Jag har sibirisk vinter fast på insidan. Hur blev mina skor så tunga? Så många stjärnor som fallit alldeles för unga. Men vi lägger aldrig av, låt mig skänka en rad. Jag samlar kraft och fyller upp min lunga. Jag sluter ögonen och ser dig komma glidande. Reggaeprofil så ögonen är kisande. Nu kommer du för evigt leva vidare i alla rubadub-soldater och krigare. Men jag undrar, går jag ensam här? Eller visar du min väg från en parallell värld? Hoppas du hör mig vart du än är. För den här går ut till våra saknade vänner. Så många frågor utan svar. Så många låtar som fanns kvar. Men vi kommer aldrig er.Nej, den här går ut till våra saknade vänner. Ni kommer alltid leva kvar i varje steg vi tar. Så vi hyllar er ni. Ja, den här gåt ut till våra saknade vänner. Våra saknade vänner...Våra saknade vänner...Våra saknade vänner.. Så vi biggar upp Junioren spangbangbangdiddledang skank Junioren han är borta, men hans tid lever än. Så vi fortsätter sprida den över hela världen. Spangbangbangdiddledang skank. Spangbangbangdiddledang skank. Junioren han är borta men hans tid lever än. Vi fortsätter prida den över hela världen. Spangbangbangdiddledang skank.. hans tid lever än...hans tid lever än.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwEL4xuh0BI

Hm, i've been wondering. It seems like our genaration are very sad and depressed. Is it just something many pass through in the years as a teen? Of course it is. I've been very depressed myself and everyday im fighting. Everyday im trying. Every singel moment. Sometimes i just wanna die. I always tried to hide it, it wasnt many who knew i've been so depressed that i have, its really few people, but all of them are there for me and today im depressed, yes, but i also know what happyness is. I finally see. Many people are depressed because they think they are so ugly, fat, to skinny, but that doesnt matter. Its not really that who makes you depressed. Its people around you. They judge, they laugh, they talk behinde your back. It's them who cause your depression. (Not all the time). It's thanks to peoples mean words. "Look at that fat girl!" "Shit look how ugly she is!" "Damn nobody wanna have her, she is to skinny!"

That hurts to hear doesnt it? And i just noticed that I am who i am, i still dont wanna be friends with people who are mean with eatchother. So why should i care about what they think? Im fat, yeah so what? It just get a little softer to hug me. Im not here to impress you. If i feel good about myself so how can you see that it's fine to look down on me?

I've cared to long about what people think of me, but that's just a waste of time. Everyone is beautiful. It just takes the right person to see that.

So start to look on the bright side, nobody is perfect!